It’s chilly this morning — the first sign of the onset of my favorite season, Fall, and I have no plans today except to sleep, maybe watch some Barney Miller, and drink coffee.
I woke up kind of laughing at myself for ever thinking twice about whether or not some random boy likes me. The truth is, I don’t really have the energy to get to know someone new, and that realization made me happy. For so long, now, I’ve been struggling to get over my past relationship, using the Cyclone as some kind of intermediate substitute, and worrying that I’ll never have another boyfriend. It is a relief to wake up this morning and find those worries suddenly insignificant.
I’m not sure how this change came about. Maybe the Confidence Fairy visited me in my sleep. All I know is that I feel free to care about other things, and it’s about time.
it is such a wonderful, cold morning. I plan to stay in bed as long as I can, finish the book I’m reading about the Mitford sisters, and drink a lot of coffee. As the Beatles put it, “Oh, that magic feeling: nowhere to go.”
In other news, it is my dear friend Sue B’s birthday today, and while we are on opposite coasts and I cannot toast her in person, I raise my cup of coffee in her honor, for she is a wonderful, hilarious person and deserving of much more than a virtual toast. Ever since we met in detention years ago, we were destined to be friends, and I’m grateful that we are.
In other, other news, I feel the spark of creativity returning. Ever since I got sick, I haven’t felt like painting or drawing, and the only writing I do is here (you’re welcome).
I’m still waiting for my test results, and I have another round of chemo tomorrow, but today, I feel more clarity than I have in a year or more. Maybe the Clarity Fairy visited me, too. Yes. I’m certain that is the case.